Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Ashes to Ashes

So Keith Richards mixed his dad's ashes with cocaine and snorted him? How practical and wise. If only I'd thought of that when my mother finally had the good taste to die. Unfortunately, I was in a Social Blackout at the time, and didn't learn of Mother's exit until long after the fact. I felt like a child who has slept through Christmas, and has woken up to find that her present is already empty. They call the day after Christmas "Boxing Day" because kids get pugilistic when they realize their Yuletide fifth has been polished off by Mommy while they slept, that bitch!

I didn't read the interview itself. Did Keith say if his father was "Good Shit"?

Does anyone know where I can score some primo parent?

I guess Father Richards was no one to sniff at.

Don't you hate when a kid gets all snotty with his parents?

The family that snorts together, cavorts together.

I get high with a little help from my friends.

Why just snort? Why not go all the way, and freebase Daddy?

Got any Peruvian Poppa?

At least the man has real Family Values, in fact his family goes for $50 a gram!

I can do these all night. To paraphrase my dear friend Dame Edna, "Keith didn't get that face from eating strawberries."

Cheers darlings.

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